By Jon Caldara | Commentary, Complete Colorado
I want to thank the taxpayers of Colorado for my brand-new car. Really, thanks to each and every one of you dupes.
You see, I have never in my 60 years had a brand new, off-the-lot automobile. Instead, I buy used, and I mean really used, cars and drive them until they drop. Out of college I bought a sexy $500 Datsun 210 and sold it eight years later for $950.
My current beater is a 2010 Nissan Altima. I bought it with 95,000 miles for $6,000. It now has over 200,000 miles and still going strong. I drive ugly, old used cars.
Why do I drive these cars? Simply, because I know what women like. While they’ll rarely admit it out loud, when a woman sees a bald man tooling around town in a 15-year-old rusted-out Japanese car she can’t help but think, “Mommy wants me some of that.”
READ THE FULL COMMENTARY AT COMPLETE COLORADO
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